I woke up upset.

It's not something like violently upset, but with a nagging feeling of... something. This usually happens to me when something dire is about to happen. If this feeling continues, I'll start to worry.

I can't believe the levels of credulity of people... actually, I do; I just had some hope that people were smarter than what they really are.

What brought this up? The news; I still watch BBC and CNN, plus my local networks, I hear the politician's comments and I can see that they are utter crap. Forget for a minute the "War against Terror" (can of worms, definitely); politicians speak of "evil", of "democracy" and the truth as that they don't understand the concept.

What good is democracy inside a country if they constantly violate other countries freedom of culture? What good are accusations of terrorism from one who answers rock-throwing with heavy artillery? What does "majority" means when statistics are used to mean whatever the politicians wanted them to mean in the first place?

To boot, the anime I see to recover my faith in humanity is on lease to a friend.

In my own country, the right is blind to reality, and the left is a bunch of opportunist that care more for their careers than for the people who elected them... and who blindingly still believe them to be great.

Pfeh... morons all...

Erich worries too much about me. :)

My emotional armor is quite thick, and past the initial shock of Nicci's departure, it had time to grow again, and I can say that my worry for her is again on the healthy part of the meter.

I'm getting to see another side of her I wanted to see. She asked me to keep track of the online RPG she started around Harry Potter, and since her family is going on a skiing trip, I'm left alone in charge of it.

And I'm talking with Nicci's other online friends; getting to know her by the impression she left in others. It was... educational. Hey, the impression she left on me made me fall in love with her :) By seeing her through others' eyes I get a more compelte picture of the things I missed, and the things she left unsaid 'cause she herself doesn't see them. What can I say? I love her more now.

On a totally unrelated topic, coming up with Prestige Classes for D&D is proving to be both easier and harder than I thought... but I'm confident I'll fill up 32 pages of stuff to send way before my Dec 13th deadline. I'm so going to get this job...

I had to retire my beloved Netscape 4.6 (yeah, I know, shut up...), For some reason the program became damaged in my last system crash. I'm using 6.1, which is not a favorite but I still like it better than IE. I'm posting this only to restablish cookies and stuff...

I hate writer's block. I really do. There's little worse than writer's block for one who wants to write for a living, as it seems what fate has decreed for me.

I'm trying to write a D&D sourcebook, and I'm stuck in the middle. I would much like to finish in the following couple of weeks, that would make a great impression on the people who contracted me to do this book, and it'd earn me points in their evaluation process, for this text serves the doulbe purpose of being a work for hire and a test for my job application for them. It's a really cool job, and I want it.

On other news, I've been chatting with Jessi, Nicci's sister. It looks like I'm filling in the role of older sibling that Nicci left temporarily empty with her sudden departure to wherever the german army sent her. She's a fun girl, and really hopes I can go and visit them soon.

And the fact that she was worried when I didn't answer her messages as I slept off last night's rpg session was... well, endearing.

I miss Nicci; and when she returns I will blame her for spoiling the fun of some movies for me. I can't look the same way at soldiers playing cannon fodder to the movie's hero. Sometimes it's just too painful to think that one of those anonymous soldiers could be her.